This season of mothering has been intense for me as my children’s personalities, likes and dislikes are becoming clearly evident. At times it can be scary for me, wondering if I am guiding them right, bending their wills to the will of the Lord without stripping them of the essence God gave them to worship Him. As a recovering strong black woman I fight against trying to control situations. I want to be clear about the difference between training my children to give them a good foundation and simply trying to make them do what I believe is best for them. Though I always seek to operate according to God’s Word, sometimes the lines are blurred when raising my beautiful strong-willed boys. Though I have a few years before they will be of typical dating age, I have recently been thinking about whether or not to let them date. My great concern is their spiritual, physical and emotional integrity. I know that I can’t prevent them fornicating, but I also know I don’t have to make it easy for them either; I don’t have to give my blessing to an supervised one-on-one interaction where temptation may just be too great for them or the girl they are with to control themselves. These are some of my early thought about whether or not I will allow my boys to date (and my husband feels the same way). Read my latest EEW column, which begins below, for more of my thoughts on this:
Whether to let our teens date can be a hairy decision for us Christian parents. We have to consider issues like if our children are mature enough to handle the emotions that come with being in a relationship, if we are providing easy access for them to sin and how they will handle a likely breakup. My oldest child is almost 10 so I have a few years before I really concern myself with his dating, but for some of you the time is now and perhaps more intense as prom season is upon us.
Should you let your children date? Is it biblical to do so? I can’t say for sure, but as I look back on my tumultuous dating life and my hand in helping my goddaughter decide about dating I just don’t know if I will let my sons date. The cons seem to outweigh the pros, not in number but in the potential impact the cons could have on them. Do I risk a lifetime of heartache for a few moments of seeming pleasure for them? Do I let them experience what many term a teenage rite of passage just so they won’t feel left out? To bring perspective to this issue, I talked to Christian parents who have made firm decisions, some to allow their children to date and others who forbid dating. I share their words and scriptures I have been meditating on to help you decide what is best for your children. Read more here.
My One Thousand Gifts List
#561-570
More clothes to giveaway to a couple with a new baby
A beautiful card and monetary gift from a beloved couple
A challenging sermon about racial reconciliation
A pastor who hears from God
Christen babysitting the children
A dinner date with Flynn
A blog custom-written for someone God had on His mind
A Bible study with Joshua in Nehemiah
Joshua asking can we have a “word of the week,” a new big word to learn
God’s grace in caring for the children while Flynn was at DBI
