“My guy’s a keeper and I’m going to do all I can to show him I’m glad he’s mine.” This was the closing line from my blog post “The Loving Husband.” So how do I plan to do all I can to show him I’m glad he’s mine? I’m going to amp up the best of what I do, namely serve him and speak well of him. Check out my post “10 Ways to Nurture Your Husband” that details all these, but in this post I want to elaborate on speak well of him. Continue reading
This may surprise some people, but I didn’t vote for President Barack Obama. I didn’t vote for John McCain either. But who I voted for is not the issue. Who’s in office and the respect due that office is. I have been utterly appalled at the blatant disrespect for the President and the office. I expect hecklers on the campaign trail but not from among US representatives or gay rights activists and to heckle the President in the middle of a presidential speech. Whether you are a Democrat, Independent or Republican, heterosexual or homosexual, you are obligated to respect President Obama and the office of the President of the United States of America.
Why is respecting Obama and his office so hard for some people? I especially don’t understand the disrespect coming from gays, with Obama being their greatest presidential advocate. Well, some people, like my girl Kim, say the heckling is based on racism. No other reason for the disrespect makes sense to me. Thinking about Obama’s political experience had me thinking about the experiences of other African Americans and politics, and what I found, as many of us know, is that race is always a factor. And too often people inject racism—“a terrible cancer eating at our hearts” to borrow the phrase from poet Nikki Giovanni, in the equation under the guise of family values and patriotism. I am pretty traditional in some of my views, but enough is enough. We can disagree without being disrespectful. Consider Giovanni’s take on Abraham Lincoln, blacks, and American politics in her poem “The American Vision of Abraham Lincoln AT THIS MOMENT” and let me know what you think about the poem and my view.
For the last three weeks, I have challenged the thoughts of some iconic black women, one of whom is a favorite of mine. I didn’t do this to get a rise out of you or to slander them. I just believe that it’s imperative for this forum—one that seeks to challenge the notion of being a strong black woman—to challenge the ideas of people that have been held in high esteem, ideas that we may otherwise dismiss because we like the people or because we don’t want to “air our dirty laundry.” But air we must because dismissal is not an option (Ephesians 5:11, 13-14a).
I could continue to talk about others’ ideas and beliefs, and perhaps I will return to them in the coming months, but for the next few posts I want to turn your attention away from specific people to concepts and ideals that we exalt and may unknowingly hold us captive. The focus of my entries will be based upon “The List.” Why don’t you take the time to review the posts “The List” and “The List Deconstructed” to see where I’ve been and to see the basis on which I will build for the next few weeks? As always, I welcome your feedback so I look forward to your comments.
Copyright 2009 by Rhonda J. Smith
Iyanla Vanzant
After deafening cheers from the audience and panelists, Vanzant told black folks that trust was their second area of responsibility and that grandma said black folks show a lack of trust by what they say and do. Ultimately, they turn to the government, instead of themselves, to get what they want. “I don’t need George Bush to tell me who I am and who I’m not,” Vanzant said. “I don’t need that. What I gotta do is go within myself.” And, as she has said throughout sharing this spiritual moment, going within herself means tapping into ancestral spirits to help her and others recognize “their divinity, their power, but also recognizing the things they do to sabotage themselves. . . .So, yes, me and grandma are having a moment. And it’s all good.”
Maybe you thought like me at first. Beyond the ethereal talk, I thought that Vanzant may have just been referring to the values her grandmother instilled in her but was just using present tense to describe how her grandmother would talk to Vanzant when she was alive. But then Vanzant closed her remarks with this: “So let us as individuals, as we address each and every one of these issues, please let us not forget that grandma will speak to you, and not only will she speak to you, but she knows that they owe you her salary, and she’ll tell you how to get it.” I love my grandmothers, and they were wonderful women. I remember their wisdom and use it. But I remember what they told me and don’t seek to find out what they can yet tell me. This is divination. This is witchcraft. This is worshipping the dead. This is not the way to honor the ancestors, if you’re a bible-believing Christian.
“When men tell you to consult mediums and spiritists, who whisper and mutter, should not a people inquire of their God? Why consult the dead on behalf of the living?” (Isaiah 8:19, NIV). Isaiah asks us two good questions that we need to ponder. If we do indeed believe in “giving honor to God who is the head of my life,” then we should make that statement true, and seek him. And if we must talk to an ancestor, let it be someone alive who God has told us to seek. Grandma may have had some good ideas, but only the one who was and is and is to come, Jesus the Christ, has the best ideas, and we must seek him for our strength.
Copyright 2009 by Rhonda J. Smith
Yesterday the Detroit Branch NAACP honored some civil rights giants during its annual Freedom Fund Dinner. Among the awards given were the Mary White Ovington Freedom and Justice Award given to the Rev. Al Sharpton and the Mary Church Terrell Freedom and Justice Award given to the Rev. Edwin A. Rowe, pastor of Central United Methodist Church in Detroit. I chose to highlight these two awards because they were named after female ancestors who made great contributions to the fight for human rights, particularly for blacks and women. They were founding members of the NAACP 100 years ago and were chosen to help establish this civil rights group because of work they had been doing prior to 1909. An award named after someone is definitely an appropriate way to acknowledge ancestors.
Some other proper tributes include the naming of a street, building or some other monument; the creation of art, like a sculpture, painting, poem, or documentary; and a holiday to honor that ancestor. All these ways keep their memories alive in those of us familiar with them and prompt others of us to seek information about them. As I read the newspaper about the Freedom Fund Dinner, I was able to introduce some and reinforce other present day activists to my six-year-old son, simply because the paper talked about the honors they received. From the NAACP tribute to a newspaper that highlighted their achievements, I was able to etch into my son’s mind the work of our ancestors. The preserving of memories is important, and we must give honor to whom honor is due (Romans 13:7). We just need to make sure that the honor preserves their memory and their proper place in our lives, as humans who contributed to the advancement of humanity.
Copyright 2009 by Rhonda J. Smith