Tag Archives: Homemaker

Parent Protector

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What Do You Think? Wednesday

“We formed a new religion: No sins as long as there’s permission and deception is the only felony…” from No Church in the Wild on “Watch the Throne” by Jay-Z and Kanye West

Before I married and had children, I never called myself a feminist, though I had many of her ways. Fifty-fifty is how some saw things, but I knew this was unrealistic. I knew I could not cast off my biological or physiological makeup to truly be equal to a man, but in the ways I could I was sure to try. After I got married, I didn’t mind being pregnant, but I was going to work my career, carry my children where I needed to make everything work. I certainly wasn’t going to be made to be “a keeper at home,” but juggling all my balls had me constantly calling on Jesus. The more I studied the word the more I understood my role as a keeper at home (Titus 2:5). And I found out that role is more than just staying at and keeping a home clean; it includes protecting my home from clearly unbiblical influences, like the song lyrics above.

I don’t care how Christians justify letting their children listen to Jay-Z, Kanye West and the like or say it’s unrealistic to tell them not to listen to their music. Anyone who would pen a lyric promoting a new religion to validate their sins is not welcome in my home. …Read the rest at EEW Magazine and let me know what you think.

I Can’t Do This

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What Do You Think? Wednesday

In the early morning hours trying to put me and some projects to bed I told God “I can’t do this” as I folded laundry while I waited for double-sided papers to come through the printer. This was 2 a.m. when I was still organizing activities so my expanding writing and speaking ministry fit with my ever so steady wife and mommy ministry. Holding up a towel, I said, “I’m good doing this. I can do this. I know how to do this.” Then in my spirit I knew that was the problem. I’m comfortable in my homemaking role and that of supporting my husband and caring for my children. This I have done full-time for five and a half years, the last three with very little outside of the home ministry. But God has shifted me and I feel that shift in my spirit. I know it’s time to move beyond my walls and blog; I have to follow God’s call, even—especially—when it seems impossible. He operates there, wanting His strength to be made perfect in our weakness so we know just who did what we did (2 Corinthians 12:9). I exist for God’s glory (Revelation 4:11). I must follow His story for my life. How about you?

In what ways have you been hesitant to move beyond your comfort zone and into the greater things God has for you?

Copyright 2011 by Rhonda J. Smith

Know What's at the Gate

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This is the first year that my oldest son will be attending a public school. My husband and I educated him at home for preschool and the first two years of elementary school. I had relatives and friends who questioned the merit of our decision to home school. Because I took my job as a gatekeeper seriously, I didn’t let people’s opinions deter me from doing what I knew we were called to do. Now that he will be attending a public school, I still am not allowing people’s contrary opinions to deter me from putting my son where I know God would have him to be.

To be an effective gatekeeper, you must know how to keep the good in and the bad out.

Know the expectations—The Word of God tells us how to live. Therefore, set family goals based on the commands of scripture for husbands, wives, and children. Not only have individual goals, but create ones for the family to meet together. For example, to fulfill take care of the poor, twice a month the family could prepare and deliver a meal to a family in need (Psalms 82:3-4, Proverbs 31:9).

Pray and fast—You need spiritual insight to direct you through what you see and don’t see. There is always a war going on in the spiritual realm that we cannot see, but God sees and directs our steps (2 Kings 6:15-17; Ephesians 6:12 and Proverbs 16:9). There are also things that God will reveal to us in the natural through prayer and fasting. And then there are those issues we observe with our own eyes. Whatever is revealed or not revealed, we still need God to direct us so we guard the gate appropriately to defeat the enemy and protect our family.

Filter entertainment—What the world rates as acceptable family entertainment many times goes against goals a Christian family may have. For instance, my children can’t watch The Flintstones or Popeye because of the sexist (both) and objectifying (Popeye) behavior in them. Sponge Bob is off limits because it’s crude. And media with gratuitous sex, violence and bad language are off limits, not just for the children, but also for me and my husband. We had to avoid two constant household favorites—The Sopranos and Sex in the City—before their series ended. I still have to make sure not to linger too long at the video section at the library so I’m not tempted to rent what I missed (1 Corinthians 15:33).

Assess family and friends—There is a saying, “Everyone who’s blood is not relative.” As a gatekeeper, you need to know which relatives are relative to your spiritual growth and which are not. Based upon your family’s goals, you know what the limits are of interaction with certain family members. Maybe the family members that like to get drunk and talk trash start cutting loose at the end of the family gathering. Make sure you come early and leave around “pumpkin time.” As for friends, the ones challenging you to do opposite of what you know to be right should be eliminated or kept at a distance. To help your children in this area, make sure you interact with families who have similar goals for their children and expose them to activities with goals that meet, or at least don’t contradict, your family’s goals.

Choose solid spiritual connections—Attend a Bible-believing church and hook up with Christian groups that have similar interests (like a book club, sports league or quilting bee). These are great ways to stay encouraged and focused on your goals.

When you have a plan, you can fulfill the job of gatekeeper and lead your family to the best God has for them.

Copyright 2009 by Rhonda J. Smith

Benefits of Gatekeeping

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We all want a job with benefits, even though for many of us these days jobs with perks are a thing of the past. Not so with God. When He gives us a job, there are always benefits, maybe not ones we immediately think of as desirable but always those that will build up His kingdom. So it is with the job of gatekeeper. Even though it’s hard work, especially considering the need to have a panoramic view, being a gatekeeper honors God and benefits the woman herself, her family, other families, and the church at large.

• Guarding the home honors God. Jesus says in John 14:15: “If you love me keep my commandments” (Also see John 14:21). Keeping God’s commandments shows that we not only love Him, but also that God’s Word is worthy of honor, especially when others see the Bible’s positive impact on our lives (Titus 2:5).

• Guarding the home benefits women. Proverbs 14:1 says, “Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands.” In the wisdom of gatekeeping, a woman builds her house, starting with herself. She is not led astray by spiritual teachers who seek their own gain, but she can follow the Word of God for her life and impact her family (2 Tim. 3:1-7).

• Guarding the home benefits husbands. When a woman focuses on doing the right thing instead of commanding her husband to get himself together and even telling him how to do it, she wins him over (1 Peter 3:1-2, 6). By following her role of submission and not usurping her husband’s authority and telling him what to do, she allows her husband to learn from his mistakes, learn from her behavior and be inclined to believe God’s Word about his position of leadership (Ephesians 5:22-33, 1 Peter 3:1-7).

• Guarding the home benefits children. When a woman understands the power of training her children in the way they should go, she will 1) instill God’s Word in them so they will always have a firm foundation (Proverbs 22:6) and 2) talk to and spank them when they stray so they will be wise and saved from destruction (Proverbs 29:15, 23:14-15).

• Guarding the home benefits other families. When a woman spends time keeping her house together, she doesn’t have time to meddle in other people’s business (1 Tim. 5:13).

• Guarding the home benefits the entire church. When each woman works as a gatekeeper to build up her house, all the homes in the body of Christ will be strengthened and all these families strengthen the church. The church, then, is better equipped to impact the nations for Jesus Christ and make the world (and eternity) a better place to live (Matthew 28:18-20).

Copyright 2009 by Rhonda J. Smith

Three Eyes of Gatekeeping

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Many jobs these days require not just multitasking but multi-roles that employers have workers do to save on hiring more employees. Sometimes these roles aren’t even explained, just given, and this leaves workers frustrated and stressed. But God is a different kind of employer. When He gives us a job, we may have multi-roles, but He always gives us direction to fulfill our roles. Such is the case with the job of being a homemaker, more illustratively known as a gatekeeper.

As a gatekeeper, a woman has to be like the Old Testament temple gatekeepers who had a panoramic view of the temple. They were posted at all four corners of the temple to make sure that God’s house was protected from predators and provided for by those selected to serve the temple. A woman with a panoramic view sees all sides of her and her family’s life so they can be on guard from the enemy’s attack and use this knowledge to benefit God’s kingdom.

Women must have hindsight, access the present and anticipate what is needed for the future. This is having a panoramic view of all sides of life. Isaiah 58:12 talks about the result of someone who looks at the ruins of the present, sees how the past has impacted the present, and because she decided to fast, she helps to positively impact the future: “And [they that shall be] of thee shall build the old waste places: thou shalt raise up the foundations of many generations; and thou shalt be called, The repairer of the breach, The restorer of paths to dwell in.”

When a woman decides to take her job of gatekeeping seriously, she can repair brokenness, build up what was abandoned, and provide stable homes for many generations to come. She will be known by her works, being a wonderful example for many generations, who, too, will know how to be gatekeepers and help strengthen the kingdom of God.

Copyright 2009 by Rhonda J. Smith