Tag Archives: Christianity

10 Physical Grooming Tips

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Being well-groomed for God must start with a spirit that’s well-groomed. So if we want to reflect godliness in our look, we have to first have godliness in our heart. Always know that whatever actions we have come from what’s in our heart. Once we get our hearts together, we must make it our business to be well-groomed physically. I have listed 10 tips to help you get started or to reinforce your focus:

1. Pray that God will give you balance. Remember you want to be well-groomed, not for self-adulation but for God’s glorification.
2. Shop at high-quality discount stores. You can have high quality looks without high quality prices. Don’t ever forget stores like Marshall’s and TJ Maxx.
3. Buy from consignment shops. When you can’t afford to buy new, even at a discount store, consignment shops are a good option. These are typically better versions of run of the mill resale shops; donors get paid for the clothing they give to consignment shops so to get the most money for their wares, they usually make sure to offer high quality clothing still in good condition.
4. Swap clothes with friends. Whether you trade clothes because your sizes have changed or you borrow an item to add to your look, friends can be good options when you don’t have time or money to shop.
5. Use coupons. These can be a hassle for me because of the time it takes to get them. But the time to buy a newspaper, check a website or ask for in-store coupons is worth the savings.
6. Care for items. Clean them immediately. Don’t allow stains to set or they may be permanent. Dirty wool attracts moths, thus holes. Also to prevent moth attacks, use cedar chips or wood hangers to avoid the smell of moth balls. Replace buttons. Repair holes. Use a lint brush and shaver.
7. Buy classic pieces. These are items that don’t go out of style, like a white shirt, dark suit, black dress and loafers. Make sure they are well made (i.e., stitching is strong) and you purchase clothing in good fabrics, like wool gabardine, silk and cotton. If you build your wardrobe on trends and not classics, you’re likely to have to change your wardrobe instead of simply updating it a bit.
8. Mix and match. Don’t wear the same shirt with the same skirt all the time. Change the shirt; add a blazer. Wear a hat. Add different color hosiery. Do something to give an old outfit a new twist.
9. Consult professionals or stylish friends for ideas. If you don’t have a clue about what I said in the previous items or you just don’t know how to put your look together once you follow the tips, get help. We all have a friend or know someone who is always well-groomed and stylish. If you don’t, check out fashion websites that have great tips. One is Possess Your Style by my childhood friend and always fashion forward Kalyn Johnson.
10. Always remember, your look is not for you but it is to attract people to your Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. We are His representatives. Let’s represent Him well.

Copyright 2009 by Rhonda J. Smith

Spiritual Grooming Tips

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When I attended a fundamentalist church, the women were required to wear head coverings. Most women wore lace doilies but being the quasi-fashion conscious maven I am, I refused. I bought a number of stylish hats so that I could be in compliance with the practice and not compromise my look. But many Sundays not compromising my look cost me time; I would build my outfits around a hat or search for the perfect hat to match my outfit. My focus was off. I wanted to get glory for my look instead of seeking to give God glory for following the standards set in that house (1 Corinthians 11:3-16). So please understand that I am well aware how we can easily be drawn into vanity when trying to give God glory. I think a look at 1 Peter 3:3-4 and Isaiah 3:16-4:1 will help us have balance.

“Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; but let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is incorruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price” (1 Peter 3:3-4). This scripture teaches that a woman’s focus should be on a heart (mind, will and emotions) that strives to express meekness and quietness. Meekness acknowledges that someone has power but that she has it under control and quietness suggests tranquility, that she shows no signs of anxiety or agitation; she is composed. So in addition to striving to be neat and clean a woman must strive to be meek and quiet. Her appearance and attitude should reflect a heart that doesn’t need to take physical control or express that she is upset because she was unable to take physical control. As we know, some Christians have misappropriated this scripture, requiring women to be homely, forcing them to be ascetics. Others have suggested that these verses are passe’ but these people are in danger of being like the Israelite women in Isaiah 3:16-4:1.

The Lord said: Because the daughters of Zion are haughty and walk with outstretched necks, glancing wantonly with their eyes, mincing along as they go, tinkling with their feet, therefore the Lord will strike with a scab the heads of the daughters of Zion, and the Lord will lay bare their secret parts. In that day the Lord will take away the finery of the anklets, the headbands, and the crescents; the pendants, the bracelets, and the scarves; the headdresses, the armlets, the sashes, the perfume boxes, and the amulets; the signet rings and nose rings; the festal robes, the mantles, the cloaks, and the handbags; the mirrors, the linen garments, the turbans, and the veils. Instead of perfume there will be rottenness; and instead of a belt, a rope; and instead of well-set hair, baldness; and instead of a rich robe, a skirt of sackcloth; and branding instead of beauty. Your men shall fall by the sword and your mighty men in battle. And her gates shall lament and mourn; empty, she shall sit on the ground. And seven women shall take hold of one man in that day, saying, “We will eat our own bread and wear our own clothes, only let us be called by your name; take away our reproach.”

If we don’t seek balance, we end up homely, threatening to repel people from us and God or we end up flashy, being a hindrance for people’s true salvation and shaming God. To have balance, we must ask ourselves questions: Why am I wearing this? Why do I want to wear this? Why am I not satisfied wearing this? How does dressing like this make me feel? How does dressing like this make me act? Who will get the glory from me wearing this? Does wearing this make me look homely? Would wearing this make me act haughty? Once we can be honest with ourselves we are able to make the necessary adjustments so our look reflects godliness and a woman striving only to give Jesus Christ glory.

Copyright 2009 by Rhonda J. Smith

Well-Groomed for God's Glory

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In my 39th week of pregnancy, countless numbers of people have told me that I should be sitting down and allowing people to wait on me. They’ve also been surprised that I am well-groomed because if any time in your life you have license to look out of sorts it is when you’re pregnant; everyone understands that you just may not have felt like pulling yourself together, and they will excuse you. Well, I have been blessed to have a wonderful pregnancy and didn’t need to take license to have my hair and clothes looking any kind of way. But even if I did feel horrible, I would have to make a way so that I would be well-groomed because I want to strive to glorify God at all times.

Do all to the glory of God

I had someone challenge me on my previous blog entry where I stated we as Christians should do our best to look our best because we are God’s representatives. He wanted to know was I making dressing well a prescription for all Christians and then wondered where the scruffy John the Baptist fit into my premise. John the Baptist was an exception because he was called to be a Nazarite. And because God called him to an ascetic lifestyle, his obedience, including his clothes of camel’s hair and a leather belt, gave glory to God. With that said, I guess you can argue that being well-groomed is based on God’s personal calling for your life and even on cultural norms. So, if God didn’t call you to a Nazarite life and you live where good grooming means, at the bare minimum, wearing clean and neat clothes, being neat and clean is what I believe we need to do in order to give God glory.

Test your vanity

Don’t confuse giving God glory with seeking vainglory. One woman said that my previous blog post gave her “another healthy reason” to keep herself looking good. And we better make sure that we have a healthy focus. Too often we can trick ourselves into believing that we have to own a piece of clothing or wear the perfect outfit in order to give God glory. Remember the basics of neat and clean, the bare minimum that expresses you care about the look of your temple of God. We are told not to do anything to bring us glory so don’t go overboard with your look. Make sure you let your eternal light be your guide.

Shine your light

Ezra told the Israelites “the joy of the Lord is your strength.” He said this on the heels of having to encourage them not to be sad but to celebrate because they understood God’s word. We, too, should celebrate, even through our appearance, because we understand God’s word, the basic message being 1) that Jesus died for our sins; 2) we who accepted his sacrifice knew we needed a savior so we repented of our sins; and 3) because of our acceptance of his sacrifice and repentance of our sins we can live blessed lives on earth and will spend eternity in heaven because Jesus Christ is our Lord and Savior, our light within. This is the joy of the Lord, that gladness that comes from God that keeps and protects us. I want to express this reality to people. This joy is within me but should manifest outside of me in my behavior, my smile, my talk, my walk (the way I treat people) and the way I adorn my body. So good grooming for the Christian starts from within, from a soul that has said yes to Jesus and wants people to know about the goodness of His salvation. Our focus should always be about attracting people to us so we can attract people to Jesus. Certainly we can do this by being well-groomed.

Copyright 2009 by Rhonda J. Smith

Look Your Best

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“Don’t you know that you yourselves are God’s temple and that God’s Spirit lives in you? If anyone destroys God’s temple, God will destroy him; for God’s temple is sacred, and you are that temple” (1 Corinthians 3:16-17).

“Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body” (1 Corinthians 6:19-20).

What do you think these scriptures have in common? Immediately your mind may think not to abuse your body, like with sex, drugs and alcohol. And this is true, but what about when you add this scripture: “. . . .[S]he is clothed in fine linen and purple” (Proverbs 31:22), describing the clothes that the Proverbs 31 woman wore? Without a doubt, I believe these show us that we should honor God with how our bodies look physically. We need to be well-groomed.

In the Bible, linen and purple were symbols of status. Though people of all classes wore linen, most times when linen was mentioned was in reference to wealthy people. And purple was an expensive dye so this was a color for the wealthy.* What we also see is that the priests of God wore linen and purple, symbols for God’s highest servants. Anyone who has been reading my blog knows that I am not advocating for believers of Jesus Christ to seek wealth or even to fake wealth until we can make wealth. But what I am saying is that we, as priests of God, should do all within our power and means to look put together because we house the almighty God in our bodies. We are hosting Him and He should have a house that is well-groomed; we don’t skimp on cleaning our physical homes when honored guests come. How much more then should we take care of our bodies, the temple of the Holy Ghost, to provide a fine vessel for our Lord?

Sometimes people just don’t care. They say they aren’t trying to impress anybody. Your hair, makeup and wardrobe aren’t to impress anyone but they are to represent the only one who has given you life, and through your representation of Him, you just may draw others to want life in Him. Do your best to look your best. You may just be helping to save a life in the process.

Copyright 2009 by Rhonda J. Smith

*Dictionary of Biblical Imagery (1998), Ryken et. al., eds.

Changing Your Mind

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I hope you know by now that a major aim of my blog is to stimulate minds in order to change hearts (thus a new mind) of black Christian women who historically have relied on making things happen themselves. The allure of being a strong black woman on your own accord is great. We like compliments; it can be nice being the center of attention; and quite frankly it’s a way many of us have always known so it’s hard to think, and, therefore, do anything other than the strong black woman way.

“And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what [is] that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God” (Romans 12:2).

But as you know, the only way that we will turn away from the world’s definition of a strong black woman is by renewing our minds. And the only way to renew our minds is to put on the mind of Jesus Christ. And the only way to put on the mind of Christ is to get to know Christ. And the only way to get to know Christ is through fellowship with Him. And the way you fellowship with Him is by reading His word and prayer. A big problem is that some of us don’t take the time to read the Bible or pray. Another problem may be that we don’t know how to engage His word or to pray.

If you are one of those people who just don’t know where to begin, you know I won’t leave you hanging. Please, visit my blog tomorrow where I will share with you ingredients for prayer that no doubt will guide you in your quest to go deeper with God. Learning how to pray properly will definitely cause you to read God’s word because in order to have an effective prayer life you must know the God that you are praying to.

Copyright 2009 by Rhonda J. Smith