Contemplating Sickness & Suicide

When you come to dark corners and they’re the end in your mind, do you make the end complete by bowing out of projects or consider bowing out of life? I’ve done both when the mantle of strong black womanhood was just too much, when other people’s demands let me know I had not enough to handle what was expected of me.

Erica Kennedy

I’m reflecting on that space today after I learned of the death of a sister-writer, Erica Kennedy, 42, a woman I never met, can’t say I ever read her words, but her life and now her death have impacted me. Her cause of death is not known publicly though various writings intimate suicide, brought on perhaps by depression or mental illness. I’m sad that Erica didn’t have what she needed, be it friends to talk to or medicine to take or something else, to help her cope in this life. Though another precious life is gone, I thank God that Erica’s death has sparked conversation about black women and depression and suicide. And for Christian women, we have the possibility to discuss more freely and without condemnation our struggles and that we need to go deep with Jesus so He leads us to our proper healing (which may include doctors and medicine). And we must always share our eternal hope in Jesus so others may receive salvation on this side of life and forever be with Him after death.

My One Thousand Gifts List

#621-630
The sun shining on my face
The pool of water making waves in the parking lot
Being led to join the A Holy Experience Gratitude Community
Meeting a white mom of an adopted black girl seeking me for guidance
Making great headway with laundry
Eating fruit in the bed with Nate and Justus
Justus and Nate attacking me with love
The boys loving going to the playground
Nate asking me to push him high in the swing while Josh swings himself high and Justus says “wee”
God protecting us at the name of Jesus from a car accident that seemed inevitable