Tag Archives: Black Woman

Soul Deep Beauty

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Esther Rolle on Good Times



Actress Esther Rolle

Once a friend of mine ridiculed me for thinking Esther Rolle, Florida on Good Times, was beautiful. Though she lived in the ghetto on TV with an angry husband, a buffoonish son and two other children who were in his shadow, I thought Florida was regal. She always held her perfectly shaped afro head high, had a dazzling smile that pronounced her high cheekbones, and beautifully smooth dark skin that looked good with her standard orange attire. When I asked her why she didn’t think Rolle was beautiful, she couldn’t tell me or didn’t want to tell me. See, her daddy told her just like mine told me that black is beautiful and good hair is any hair that you have on your head. She couldn’t tune her mouth to say that Rolle was ugly because she was dark and she had nappy hair. If she said this, she knew she would be saying that black isn’t beautiful and nappy hair ain’t good. She settled for “Wow, you believe that?” And I said, “Yep, I do” for all the reasons I said above and for the Bible scriptures below:

So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.—Genesis 1:27

For by him all things were created, in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities–all things were created through him and for him.—Colossians 1:16

And God saw everything that he had made, and behold, it was very good. And there was evening and there was morning, the sixth day.—Genesis 1:31

God, the creator of all things, was intentional when he created man—male and female—making us in His image and saw His creation as “very good.” Because of these verses, I can say with David “I am fearfully and wonderfully made” (Psalm 139:14). I can say Rolle was fearfully and wonderfully made and so is the pale lady with the large blue eyes, the blue-black man with the straight hair, the tall scrawny kid with the freckled face, and the olive-skinned lady with the coarse wild mane. I say with David to God “Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.” Like God’s intentional hand in making the physical me, my daddy had an intentional hand in making the soulish me. And I’ve searched and studied the Scriptures to mature the soulish me, to get my mind, will and emotions to agree that all of God’s creation is “very good.” This is soul deep beauty, transcending spiritual and politically correct talk and helping us walk out God’s truth. I hope we seek soul deep beauty for us and our children so we believers can hold up God’s standard and impact humanity for good.

Check out my new column in EEW Magazine that challenges parents to teach their children against dark-skin prejudice.

What have been your challenges to believe God’s beauty standards and not society’s beauty standards?

Copyright 2011 by Rhonda J. Smith

My One Thousand Gifts List

#81-90
Clean clothes to change into
A baby talking in his sleep who stayed asleep
Time talking to God in the night of morning
A strong desire for God’s company, direction
Being able to pay for a ticket and get a court date for other citations while on lunch break from trial
Getting to court only two minutes late
The trial evidence not being complicated
A group of friendly fellow jurors
A tasty lunch
Sunshine

Dark Girls

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What Do You Think? Wednesday

Once this woman, over dinner, told me that she was glad her husband was light skinned because she didn’t want her children “to be as dark as me.” My heart sank, feeling compassion for her low self-worth in that area and anger that those thoughts were coming from a 30-something woman in the 21st century. By all accounts this successful professional in the medical field was a strong black woman, planning her career, making her own decisions and never holding her tongue, sometimes, like that evening, making comments revealing her insecurity. I wish we lived in a land where dark skin prejudice was not an issue, where skin lighteners, hair straighteners and plastic surgery only had their place because of need (or even convenience) that had nothing to do with trying to look white. But the hatred remains and is a reason this film can stake a claim in the movie market in 2011. This film comes 335 years after the official end of the legal enslavement of blacks in the United States and almost 500 years since the beginning of this demonic system that created divisions between light and dark-skinned blacks. Have you seen the preview of Dark Girls? If not, take a look and tell me what you think, particularly from a biblical point of view?

Dark Girls: Preview from Bradinn French on Vimeo.

Black Women Under the Microscope

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Image from the controversial Pepsi Superbowl commercial

What Do You Think? Wednesday

Satoshi Kanazawa, the psychologist who posited that black women are less attractive than all other women, faces possibly losing his job because of his article that presented these “findings.” His is just the latest in a string of commentaries that have discussed what’s wrong with the black woman. Whether it’s our looks, spending habits, marital status or attitudes, we frequently have been under the media microscope over the last few years.

What do you think about this? Do you feel like a lab rat? Do you feel it necessary to respond to the negative onslaught? How do you respond? As a Christian, what type of response do you think we should have?

I can’t wait to hear from you.

Copyright 2011 by Rhonda J. Smith

Ugly Women?

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What Do You Think? Wednesday

It is so important to know who we are in Christ:

  • A royal priesthood (1 Peter 2:9)
  • A selected and treasured people (Titus 2:14)
  • An anointed people (2 Corinthians 1:21)
  • Fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14)
  • An heir with Christ (Titus 3:7)
  • Made for good works (Ephesians 2:10)
  • Able to walk in wisdom, display the fruit of the Spirit, righteousness, and everything that is good (Colossians 4:5; Galatians 5:22-23; Romans 8:4; Philippians 4:13).

    • If we don’t know, we would be apt to snap back at this. This “scientific” article in a scientific magazine by a practicing scientist could make a recovering strong black woman stray from her path and put a brotha in his place. But I digress, suggest you read this (if you can get through it) and let me know what you think.

    Copyright 2011 by Rhonda J. Smith

    A Safe Place

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    What Do You Think? Wednesdays

    The other day my sister and I were talking about what makes non-church going folks say “I have to get myself together” and “I don’t have nothing to wear” before they can come to church. Sometimes they claim these are barriers because they want to keep on living the way they’re living, but sometimes they really do think self-help and a Sunday best wardrobe are what they need. Where did they get these notions? I believe folks in the church have created these barriers, ridiculous preconditions that have nothing to do with the soul-saving power of Jesus Christ and the transforming work that He can continually do in our lives. We don’t have the power to get ourselves together and we can never dress up our pain and confusion. But non-church going folks think so, and others, especially we strong black women, do, too.

    Our legacy of strength makes us believe we have to keep ourselves together, never falling apart, never exposing ourselves to the church, the body of Christ, our family, fitly joined together to meet everyone’s needs (Ephesians 4:16). This includes OUR needs. We don’t get help in the church because we don’t want to expose ourselves and, unfortunately, churches don’t want us exposing ourselves. They need us to keep it together to run the ministries we run and some leaders just don’t know how to minister to us. The façade is easier, but no one can play these roles forever. We eventually fall apart in a farther gone place because of too few safe spaces like this website that are so prevalent outside the church. I thank God for my church’s counseling ministry that even has designated times to just walk-in and see a counselor. We even have intimate classes for women taught by strong biblical women. Besides offering these ministries and other sermon-styled women’s ministry functions (that usually don’t allow for transparency and intimacy), what does your church do or what do you think the church needs to do to create safe places for hurting women who think they need to mask their pain? As always, I look forward to hearing from you.

    Copyright 2011 by Rhonda J. Smith