Friday Feature: Abstinence and Trust

Life and death have met me a lot this week—their notions and results of those who have chosen each have caused me to think deeply, more definitively, about my own beliefs, particularly in light of the 38th anniversary of the Roe v. Wade decision legalizing abortion. Whenever a hot button issue surfaces, Christians should take a stand, if not publically, in their own hearts based upon the heart of God. His counsel to us—not our feelings or conscience—is what we must follow, but this is not always easy to do, especially for women like strong black women.

In keeping with natural methods of healthcare, abstinence is undoubtedly the only natural way to keep from getting pregnant. This should be the decision for Christian singles, with sex being reserved for marriage. In marriage, ideally you and your husband should agree on whether or not to have a child. If you decide not to have children, the only natural form of birth control is the rhythm method. You could abstain from sex, but you would have another set of issues besides unwanted children, and those issues you don’t want.

But what about those hard issues, like an unexpected (and unwanted) pregnancy that comes from a slip in decision on a lonely night or from a cruel man, a stranger or one in your own bedroom? Is abortion acceptable in these situations? Is abortion the “natural” response to getting rid of something you didn’t expect, want, or plan for or don’t want around to remind you of a bad decision or the violent act? If the mother of a poet I love who loves so many or an evangelist who feeds the souls and bodies of thousands each year decided abortion was natural after they were raped, I and so many others would miss the love of these soul-feeding wonders. And I wonder what soul-feeding wonders were among the more than 50 million babies aborted since the passage of Roe v. Wade in 1973. And I wonder how many mothers thought their decision was natural because they were told that what was in their womb was not yet life or that they had the power to change their destiny and they believed it, wanted and needed to believe that, because they didn’t know or hadn’t considered the counsel of God.

We have believed that we have the freedom to choose in all things. God would not have given man volition if we didn’t have the right to choose, we say. But He says, “This day I call heaven and earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live” (Deuteronomy 30:19). God gives us a choice but then commands us to choose life. I choose life, personally knowing the horror of rape and the turmoil of receiving something I didn’t expect from it. God’s council is true and life affirming even in the midst of personal darkness, death visited upon us. His council is the only one that we can trust and eventually rest secure in (Psalm 56:11, 2 Corinthians 1:8-10).

Copyright 2011 by Rhonda J. Smith

Reproductive Rights

The age old argument for abortion goes: “I’m not in favor of abortion for me, but I believe women should have a choice to decide what they want to do with their own bodies.” I used to think that, too. In my teens and early 20s, I was vocal about it and placed money on it, giving $200 to help fund a friend’s late term abortion. An age old argument for birth control methods goes: “I don’t want to get pregnant so I’m going to take birth control pills. I am being responsible.” That I used to think, too, and placed my money on it, offering a nominal fee to Planned Parenthood for my birth control pills. Even after Jesus became my Savior at 26, I still took birth control pills and did so for the first few years of my marriage. Well, I changed my mind on both when I began to see what use God had for my body:

    “Be fruitful and multiply, and replenish the earth”—Genesis 1:28 (KJV).
    “But did He not make them one, (h)aving a remnant of the Spirit? And why one? He seeks godly offspring.”—Malachi 2:15 (NKJV).
    “Or don’t you know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself. . .”—1 Corinthians 6:19 (NLT).

God wants me to have children so the earth will be filled with people who live for and worship Him. I can’t decide what I want to do with my body because it doesn’t belong to me, but to God. He is the owner and has the right to tell me what to do with it. So while I understand the classic arguments why people should be able to choose abortion or to control whether or not they have children through other birth control means, I believe that the imminent death of the mother (like in the case of a tubal pregnancy) is the only time an abortion should be performed. And I personally believe that thinking that I can’t handle having another child because of economic or emotional reasons is definitely not a reason to abort and may not be cause to use birth control, especially those designed to kill the fetus after conception (like the Morning After Pill). So the only reproductive right I believe the Christian woman has is to remain in concert with her maker’s intent for her body. This is what I think. You know I want to know what you think. Please give your comments and let’s hash this out together.

Copyright 2009 by Rhonda J. Smith