Category Archives: Sisterhood

Tips for Activating Good Will

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With Sisters in Christ

1. Resolve in your mind that you want God’s will above your will (Matthew 26:39).
2. Don’t vent to others unless they are wise counselors and you are seeking biblical advice. You may be unknowingly gossiping about the person.
3. Meet with the person who has offended with you. Discuss your issues with biblical reconciliation at the forefront of your mind (Matthew 18:15-16; Philippians 4:2-3; 2 Corinthians 5:18-20; Galatians 6:1; and James 5:16).
4. Meet again with a mediator if you two don’t come to a biblical resolution. Remember there is wisdom in a multitude of counselors (Proverbs 11:14). Make sure you both agree on who any additional people should be. These should be people who are known to strive to meet biblical standards of reconciliation.
5. Understand that reconciliation may not be immediately available, but that doesn’t mean you don’t strive for it (Matthew 18:17; Romans 12:18).
6. Continue to work to do God’s will with your sister in Christ or without her, making sure not to slander her.

In the World

7. Fulfill God’s commands to impact the world for Christ (Isaiah 61:1-2). In Christ’s stead, we must be his hands and feet on the earth to meet the needs of people.
a. Preach gospel of Christ to those in need. Do everything you can to tell people about salvation through Jesus Christ. Don’t stop there. Show people, through your actions, the power and love of Jesus by
b. feeding the hungry.
c. clothing the naked.
d. binding up (bandage or heal the wounds of) the brokenhearted.
e. comforting all that mourn.
Do all these for individuals you know, through your church, established organizations or a ministry you begin. The point is: Don’t make an excuse for not doing good: being kind to your brothers and sisters in Christ and showing benevolence to those throughout the world. This is the call for all Christians, including the strong black woman who’s trying to refocus her attitude from simply doing good to look good but doing good because goodness emanates from her changed heart that seeks to be like Christ.

Copyright 2009 by Rhonda J. Smith

Cut the Fuss

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I plead with Euodia and I plead with Syntyche to agree with each other in the Lord. Yes, and I ask you, loyal yokefellow, help these women who have contended at my side in the cause of the gospel, along with Clement and the rest of my fellow workers, whose names are in the book of life.

If I hear one more “If she. . .” or “But she. . .” after someone has said she has forgiven her sister, I just might scream. Dwelling on the offense is an offense in itself. It debilitates the speaker, slanders the original offender, gives credence to Christianity being weak, and wastes time in the battle for souls for Christ. I want a change; so I, like Paul, plead with the sisters who are beefing to be of the same mind in the Lord, and I urge others with influence to help any women they see bickering, giving more attention to their beef than to the cause of Christ.

Help them drop their nets.

Yes, Jesus told His disciples to drop their nets—meaning to give up their jobs, to follow Him. But some of us need to drop our nets of bickering because this can be a full-time job for us. We give so much attention to the detail of our fleshly battle that we have become all-consumed, just like the attention we give to full-time work. Drop your net and agree with each other in the Lord to continue “in the cause of the gospel.”

Paul wanted Euodia and Syntyche to work out their differences by focusing on the Lord. What does the Lord say about us getting along? This should be our focus. When we focus on our feelings and the offenses and can’t get pass them, we are exalting these issues above God. They have become idols that God tells us to tear down. We must tear them down not just so the world sees our harmony but that we might have harmony to do God’s work together. I believe this is what Paul was having these Christians focus on: God and his work that needs to be done. He first said he wanted Euodia and Syntyche to agree but not just agree in any way (going along to get along) but agreeing in the Lord (renewing their minds to line up with Jesus’ thoughts and actions). This is the only way that we can reach out to a dying world and rescue people from the grips of the enemy.

Copyright 2009 by Rhonda J. Smith

Hypocrite No More

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She was convinced that her friend did it on purpose, even though the friend denied it. At first she believed her friend, but the evidence against her was mounting and was now overwhelming. Instead of talking to her friend, again, and even bringing a mediator to the meeting, she decided that she would be cordial when she saw her at church, simply smile and speak. That would be it. “I’m still going to be kind to her,” she told me. “I have nothing against her, but I’m just going to smile and speak and keep going.”

I understood her reaction, having done as much myself. It takes a lot of energy to mend a situation that 1) you didn’t cause; 2) came about because it seems like someone lied; and 3) ranks on your list as trifling, and those you choose to do without. Yet the Scripture tells us to be good, which speaks to being useful in your disposition, expressed through the way you speak and what you do. This goes beyond the motions of speech and act but comes from a heart that seeks to be like Christ.

“By this shall all [men] know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another” (John 13:35).

“Be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you” (Ephesians 4:32).

The goodness that we are called to is based upon these scriptures. Our behavior is not about us going along (going through the motions of speech and action) to get along (appearing that all is well amongst us). It’s about showing the world who we, Christians, belong to. Going beyond the appearance of good to actually saying and doing what is useful gives credibility to Christianity and Christians who call on the name of Jesus Christ as lord and savior. Judgment begins at the house of God (1 Peter 4:17). And what better way to begin this process than with self-examination? We must seek true transformation in our interactions so the good we do is contagious and truly reflective of a heart seeking to be like Christ.

Copyright 2009 by Rhonda J. Smith