What Do You Think? Wednesday
Sometimes you just don’t hit it off with people. No matter how you engage them in conversation, do a good deed, smile and give a hug, some folks just won’t be your best buds. I knew this when I met one of my husband’s relatives about 10 years ago. The whole night she talked about how the Lord had blessed her with a new home and a new car. She showed off her jewelry and talked about other material ambitions. I’m sure I twisted my face and rolled my eyes a few times before leaving the room. I couldn’t stand being in her presence. When I think back to it I probably didn’t like her because the pride I saw in her was what I hated seeing in myself. I couldn’t express that then, only “I don’t care if I ever see her again, Flynn.” But I did, on Monday, and briefly thought about not acknowledging her because she hadn’t noticed me. I decided against that. After reminding her who I was and getting her name again, she commented on my children and quickly said, “I’m so glad my kids are beyond that stage.” And I mustered a smile and shook my head knowingly; she continued texting, and that was the end of our conversation.
Just the other day at the library some stranger hurried my sons on the elevator and said to me, “I’m so glad my children are grown. I had boys and they were busy.” I simply smiled. What do you say to people who don’t think before they speak, who assault you with their thoughts, who gloat about their gratitude, which serves to shame you? Ten years ago, I would have twisted my face and rolled my eyes and served up some shame of my own. But I have learned to smile and nod and not be tangled on the inside. “It is God that girdeth me with strength, and maketh my way perfect.” Because God has me in the season of small ones and different opportunities, I can gently ignore others who may have despised their season. My best friend Renee’s favorite verse is “The lines have fallen to me in pleasant places; Indeed, my heritage is beautiful to me” (Psalm 16:6). And I have claimed its message strong in this season of small ones and different opportunities, knowing they all come from Him. I may not hit it off with everyone I meet, but those encounters will always show me how much I have grown (or need to grow), and that is a good thing.
What encounters have you had that showed you how much you have grown or need to grow?
Copyright 2011 by Rhonda J. Smith
What encounters have you had that showed you how much you have grown or need to grow?When I first was pregnant with baby number three: With no grace, I took the jokes, the instructions to buy a television, the quips that I was poison, and listening to the men of the church tell their wives to stay away from me. Most of the time, I just took it. But sometimes, I would respond with darts full of poison: “Were you asked to buy a diaper?” “How does sex with my husband, conception, my carrying a child for 9 months, laboring and birthing, my husband and I responsibly being the conduit for blessings and provision for our kids have to do with you any way?” My most hurtful attack was to a man whose wife had not concieved. I implied that there was a malfuction within his physiology. For this, I am ashamed. As our family grew past 4, 5, 6,………….. I learned that their responses had nothing to do with me. An older pastor’s wife and mother of 11 once said,”Their beef is with the Lord.” I did not understand at the time, but I learned from the Bible and some truly gracious honest women that my eight children to them was a challenge to how much of their wombs they were willing to relinquish to God. If I had just been slow to speak, their would be no regrets. If I had trusted God with my mouth, anger, and hurt, as I learned to encourage women to trust their bodies to God, I would have nothing to write about.
Abbey, I was having trouble responding to you. I’m so glad that you regret your comments, though I understand your saying them. We have to work hard at walking in the Spirit when others don’t work hard doing so. Thanks for sharing.