For six years it’s been, me toying with the notion of the strong black woman. Who is she? Who am I? How is she doing? What should she be doing? Should she even be? Should I even be this iconic superwoman? Well I believe the answers to these questions will inevitably surface as I muse on this topic and receive your responses to this woman that we all know. She is our friend. She is our mother. She is our grandmother. She is our pastor. She is we. But is she something that enlightened 21st Century women should claim, particularly those whose faith is based on the ways, will and word of Jesus Christ? My husband calls me strong. All my friends seek my strength. Those I minister to embrace my virtue. My skin color reveals that I am what we call black. And my biological and physiological makeup undoubtedly make me a female human. So ain’t I a strong black woman? Stay tuned.
Copyright 2008 By Rhonda J. Smith
I think so! I feel like I am a strong black women. We do so much and it is nothing but the grace of God that gives us the strengh to keep going. We are the caretakers, cookers, comforters, encouragers, friend, mothers, wifes and most of all a women of God and fighting to keep that peace that was so gracouly giving is hard. Keeping my mind on one thing is hard because I usally have so much to do. So a strong Black woman I think can have different many different makeups. Holding up and keeping your family together is number one.
Hey Rhonda
I am excited about this new project for you. I look forward to reading, learning, listening, and disputing (some) of your thoughts and lessons learned. Thank you for loving us enough to share.
Rhonda
I too muse over the concept or practice of the strong black woman. In my opinion it is a trap. It traps us into believing we are more powerful than we really are. The practice of being a strong black woman is stressful and at many levels unattainable. I think we confuse the term with supportive, intelligent woman. I look at the example of Michelle and Barack Obama. Michelle is a supportative, intelligent woman who has never publically tried to over-step her husband. I know Barack threw out the term strong black woman as he referred to his wife but in practice I don’t see that model being potrayed between them . I still believe in the quote “Behind every good man there is a great woman” that is Barack’s secret! A great woman knows her strength lies in her natural god-given quality of influence. A secure woman is comfortable in that role never feeling inferior to a man. I see Michelle as having a awesome example in her mom as she watched her mom and dad’s example. She stated to the press she wanted to stay home and take care of the girls, making sure their transition went smoothly, the press closing comment; an “Ivy League” graduate I don’t know how long she can do that. As if they thought a stay home mom did not mirror her credentials. We must look back and see where the strong black woman role originated and see it as a trap then and a trap now. God is the one who is strong and our source to depend on completely, all other sources are sinking sand.
Yes you are Rhonda, as long as you stay planted on the Rock. Skin color nor gender dictates strength or statue. For too long, strong for us has been linked to super and super has made us think that doing it all, for all and being to all everything — makes us strong. “I’m Every Woman Syndrome”. But that’s not what we need to buy into. I’m NOT every woman and wisdom and common sense will make me realize that and STOP trying to be. The strength we want to “take the credit” for is the “Grace of God”. We need to just give Him the honor for allowing us to do anything even if it’s NOT EVERYTHING at the same time. The joy we have from giving the glory the honor and the praise releases us to rest while we’re doing and becomes the source of our energy, knowing that we are operating in Him (living, moving and having our being) and when we get to the other side and don’t know how we got there (time and time again) we KNOW it was because He carried us! The joy of the Lord is our strength. Nothing more, nothing less!
I’m slightly hesitant to share my viewpoints or thoughts…considering there maybe “Strong Black Women” reading….. The term, idea, even the very image of a “Strong Black Woman embraces the past. It’s vital to know our past. I love history. I honestly read and watch it every chance I get. But when you linger in the past, and embrace it as if it’s the present, it’s a problem.
Coining yourself as a “Strong Black Woman” ?!?!!?!
I thought I read somebody else post about the “Strong Black Woman” being overrated.
Is she overrated??? I must agree. That something, or “it,” many people think the strong black women possess (how she looks, that look in her eyes) …could be hidden pain and indescribable disappointment. Pain because of all she has done or attempted to do in her own strength. Pain because of all the disappointments she’s experienced: broken promises, broken dreams, broken relationships, broken lives…… disappointments because of what should have been, what was suppose to be and ……..
Every “Strong Black Woman” I know seems to be bitter. They may not be wearing an “I’m bitter” t-shirt, but if you listen for awhile the bitterness will seep out in the dialogue. The pain will look at you so strong, you leave thinking “Lord, I don’t want to be like her at all.” And if you’re not mindful, that same subtle bitterness will be on you.
We’re redeemed. Old things are allllllll passed away. We are NEW creatures of beings that never existed before. Relish in the newness of life in Christ for real. Relish in knowing that who the Son has set free is FREE indeed. We’re suppose to cast down images and imaginations that exhault themselves against the knowledge of God ………. The Strong Black Woman exalts herself higher than the knowledge of God……Relish in the promises.